I think sometimes people get a little too hung up on the ways they’re hurt or damaged. And I think those people are also the ones who tend to be the least forgiving.
It’s only when we accept that pain and mistakes are part of life that we can accept ourselves and each other for what we really are.
^
"Sometimes, people just don’t care or have their own ways of showing that they care. Learn to discern the two."
(via psychology2010)
(via awildsabshasappeared)
Myth of the Hymen, dodsonandross.com
One of the reasons I wanted to share this was to show the sexualized violence around language of female sexuality. There is no “breaking,” “popping” or otherwise of the hymen— and you don’t lose it, it stays with you your whole life!
So if you’re worried about having penetrative sex for the first time because you think “breaking the hymen” will hurt—relax!
- Use PLENTY of lube (water based with condoms!), even if you think you don’t need it.
- Use condoms, dental dams, or latex gloves (unless you have an allergy to latex, then use non-latex alternatives) with appropriate (Water-based) lube. I always try to get lube without glycerin or parabens because I have sensitive skin and am prone to yeast infections.
- Go SLOWLY and listen to what your body is telling you.
- Masturbate and get comfortable with your own body and sex will be a lot better than if you have no idea what gets you off.
- Don’t rush into it the first time (or even the first few times).
- Sex should be pleasurable. Take your time and experiment with fingers, tongues, and toys.
- Use lube (I cannot stress this enough!)
- Relax and have fun with your partner. Otherwise, what’s the point of having sex?
(Source: feministsextoys, via fuckyeahsexeducation)
(Source: leilockheart, via leilockheart)
(via zodiacchic)
(Source: conflictingheart)
Sometimes I am sitting at home and watching people I know suffer, and I think I need to suffer too. I sit in front of my computer very quietly and very still and try not to enjoy anything too much. I try not to get anything done; if they can’t, then I won’t. I try to share the suffering. I want to be sad with them as if that was a type of empathy they would appreciate, or even know about. As if they could feel a bit of their suffering alleviated as I take it on.
This, of course, is an act of futility. The best way I can help those people I know who are suffering is to let them know I’m here for them, or, if that wouldn’t be quite right, then I should continue doing whatever it was that drew us together in the first place.
Stop sitting quietly. Stop being still.
Sometimes the only way to try and understand how someone is feeling is to mirror their emotion, and then figure out how to respond to them appropriately. Sometimes that response is just to sit with each other in silence, being there.
These words.
(Source: the-cellardoor, via abcdefghijay)
"
A relationship is based not on love, but on trust, forgiveness and respect. Trusting that person with who you are and letting them know and understand you. Forgiving that person for each of their wrongdoings however big or small. And respecting them as a person, as an individual and an equal.
In the matter of distance, the only thing that breaks up a long distance relationship is not the space between them, but doubt. Doubt becomes fear, which becomes anger, which in turn forms mistrust, inability to forgive and loss of respect.
The people around you who think you can only fall in love with someone they’ve met are truly lost. They are settling with convenience. With a population well over 7 billion, the person who would compliment your personality, meet levels of attraction and someone you can trust, forgive and respect living in your town is one in shutthefuckup.
They don’t understand love or what it means, they are the ones who are truly blind to see beyond the physical state. Unable to hear the truth of another’s soul and paralysed in the heart to understand the beauty that can be found from opening their heart beyond their home town.
"Sid is one smart motherfucker (via machistado)
(via nikkotine)
Have I ever had “ANY unwanted/undesired physical or sexual contact”?
Earlier in this pregnancy, I filled out my “Initial Health History” form for prenatal and birth care. You know: check the box if you’ve experienced severe headaches, diabetes, all sorts of things. After the usual “Emotional abuse,” “Physical abuse,” “Sexual abuse,” I got to this very interesting item: ”ANY unwanted/undesired physical or sexual contact.”
read the link. so spot on.
[trigger warning LIKE WHOA at the link for rape culture, coercion, and general unwanted attention]
Because I can hardly stand the thought of these constant erosions of personhood seeming normal to our daughters and sons.
READ THIS
This was deeply unsettling to read. Because yes, every single thing that she touched on has happened to me, and yes, I consider myself to be one of the “lucky” ones. Ugh. I have had disrespectful doctors, forceful boyfriends, really creepy “friends.”
This should not be the way things are.
Please click the link and read this. It’s not long I promise, but it is so, so good.
I ask all of you to please click the link and read it. Like Nikk says, it isn’t long, but it’s so very good.
It’s an fantastic and important read for all gender identities.
(Source: manifestfreedom)
(via scottmcgoldrick)